When parents separate, the whole family has to adjust. Married parents preparing for divorce often have to work cooperatively with one another to share their parental responsibilities. Parents have to divide the time spent with the children and responsibility for their immediate needs. They have to address financial responsibility for their children and the authority to make decisions about their upbringing.
Frequently, parents can work cooperatively to set custody terms with one another. Some couples find agreeing on custody to be prohibitively difficult. In such cases, they may need to go to court. Family law judges can assist with the allocation of parental rights and responsibilities when parents don’t reach an agreement.
Family law judges consider a number of different key criteria when making decisions. The preferences of the children in a family can be an important factor to integrate into that decision-making process.
When do children’s preferences matter to judges?
Children of all ages may have wishes regarding parenting schedules, but they may not have the maturity to really understand the situation. As such, Texas imposes a minimum age for seeking a child’s input in custody disagreements. Typically, children need to be at least 12 years old for their wishes to influence a judge’s determination in a contested custody scenario.
Children do not automatically get to choose where they live or how the judge divides parenting time. Instead, they can communicate their preferences and the reasoning behind them. Judges can then choose how much weight to give the child’s preferences in light of other details about family circumstances.
Children who expressed a preference for a parent who provides less structure or gives them more gifts may influence the judge’s perspective less than those who have strong feelings based on an unhealthy dynamic with one parent or other practical concerns. The need to express custody preferences can be somewhat stressful for children, who may worry about their wishes negatively impacting their connection with one of their parents.
In many cases, parents who want to limit the stress their children experience may need to consider settling custody disagreements instead of litigating. Understanding what factors judges must consider and how they evaluate a child’s preferences in a contested custody case can help parents navigate what can be a stressful and emotional process in more informed ways.
